How to be in Control of Your Emotions in a Relationship

Emotions are the most present force in our lives that dictate our thoughts, actions, and intentions. Sometimes we know exactly what we should do in order to get what we want yet we find ourselves doing the complete opposite as a result of emotional responses. Learning how to control our emotions in a relationship, is an essential skill that everyone must acquire in order to communicate more effectively with their partner.

Negative emotions such as hate, anger, sadness, jealousy and bitterness, tend to get out of control, especially in times of pressure and distress. Even though sometimes we let our negative emotions take over our lives, we need to learn how to think more rationally and control our emotions. If we train ourselves to think more realistically, we will become much happier in life. Here are the six most effective ways to control your emotions!

Don’t React Right Away

Reacting right away to emotional triggers can be a huge mistake you'll probably regret later. Many people are very reactive to even the slightest of things, and this is the biggest problem in a relationship.

You don't need to become a person that has no emotions, but you must learn to be calm and collected when something bad is thrown your way. When something bad happens, don't reply back immediately. Just breathe deeply for a few minutes to calm yourself down and start thinking how you can positively respond.

Change Your Thoughts

Whenever you are faced with a negative emotion which is making you think something bad, replace it with a different thought. If you change your thoughts you may not be able to change the whole situation, but you can definitely change the way you believe that situation is affecting you. Replace your sad and pessimistic thoughts with thoughts that lead to joy and happiness and you will certainly improve your relationship and your life.

Change Your Response

If you can't change your thoughts and you're unable to shift your focus, you can always change your response. You can choose how to deal with negative emotions instead of responding automatically. Even though it may help you to be angry and express your rage, close your eyes, take a deep breath and calm yourself down before responding. Emotions should be released in a healthy way and this is the reason why so many people find it helpful to engage in exercise or meditation.

Learn To Be Present

Learning how to be present can bring peace and calmness into your stressful day. No matter how out-of-control your emotions are, the act of being present can change your life. When you look at all of the problems you think you have, you will realize that the problems are entirely in your mind. When you find yourself being flooded with emotions, take a step back for a second, remain calm and realize that you are here and you are fine. Whichever has just happened to you, it doesn’t change the fact that thinking about the past will do nothing to help your present situation.

See The Bigger Picture

Everything that happens in our lives, whether good or bad, happens for a reason. Learn to see let go of the past and recognize the bigger meaning of any given situation. As time goes by, you'll definitely get to see the "bigger picture" falling into perfect order. Everything that happens in this present moment feels like a permanent wave of negative emotions that won't go away no matter what you do. However, even in emotionally upsetting moments, keep your eye on the bigger picture and believe that every situation (bad or good) is permanent.

Learn To Forgive

Learn to forgive your emotional triggers which may be your family members, your best friend or your partner. You may feel a wave of anger and rage in the moment, but when you forgive, you detach from that resentment. However, learning to forgive is a difficult thing for many people and it is a process that takes time. Learn to forgive yourself and others and you'll feel much more free, and in control. When you realize that your emotions cannot control you, but you should control your emotions, you will become a happier person.